When I wrote my first book, I thought being an author would be fun. All these people would buy my book and love it…and that would make me feel all warm and fuzzy. I’ve learned since that being an author isn’t easy (nor warm and fuzzy).
The hardest thing for me was admitting that I was an author. I’m shy and quiet by nature, so it was excruciating to market my own book…and heaven forbid I tell anyone I knew that I was an author. Suddenly, that seemed too braggy and grandiose. So I minimized myself and my book.
Granted, I don’t make a living off of being a writer. We’d be living on Top Ramen 3x a day if I had to feed my kids off the royalties from my one book so far. But still…I wrote that book. My name’s on the cover. And it’s quite a good story (if I say so myself). I love my plot and characters; My story hasn’t bored me yet (and that’s saying a lot since I’ve probably read it no less than 100 times; no joke).
My first book, Eyes of Light, was my birth as an author. For the past 8 months, I’ve been a toddler in the Writing World…learning slowly from other authors and stumbling along as I try to walk the walk and talk the talk of an Adult Author.
I’m still not a grown up author yet…but I can walk on my own (without falling and hitting my head on the coffee table). I have a legitimate website (click on Home to see)…my 2nd book is close to being released…and I’ve honed my writing skills (I don’t write “Goo goo ga ga” anymore). Most important though is that I accept myself as an author (and that is probably the biggest step of all).
Now, as I prepare for the release of Secret Keepers, my second book in the Eyes of Light trilogy, I can shout out: “I’m an author!” Even if I’m not a best-selling author…I’m an author, nonetheless. I love writing and creating new characters and worlds where I can delve deep into myself and what I believe.
So no more closet writing for me. I’ve been BORN…and can’t crawl back in my cave of complacency to hide anymore. Secret Keepers should be out by February. I won’t pinky-promise on that (because I’ve been wrong before), but I’m doing all in my power to get it ready for publishing. Thanks to all of you who have supported and cheered me on during my writing journey. You are the best!
And I’m curious…have you been gun-shy about telling others about what you do or dream about because of feelings of inadequacy? How did you overcome it? Or do you still fight those feelings and sell yourself short?